Travels with Jonny

Jon, you have been my best friend, performance partner and fellow road dog since we met at the University of Massachusetts in the fall of 2000. We've logged enough miles on the road together to drive around the circumference of the earth...twice.

Today is your birthday, and it's not just any birthday, it's your Throwback Thirty-Third birthday. As part of a collaborative effort to spotlight the many highlights of your life, this blog post has been created to relive our many adventures on the road. Buckle up, Jon. We're going on a road trip down memory lane.

Florida

A spring break road trip in 2001 brought us to many amusing destinations, including South of the Border in South Carolina and City of Palms Park in Fort Myers, Florida for Red Sox spring training. A subsequent trip in 2007 brought us to Fort Myers and Naples for a string of Dirty Water shows and several spring training games. You went toe-to-toe with the venue owner when he tried to bail out on our agreement...and won. Is this mic on?

Maine

On the way to Maine, we had some alleged car troubles, which lead to being imprisoned by a family friend. The Old 97's (a.k.a. Bucket of Dump) got us to Maine the next morning.

Toronto

A performance at the Toronto Improv Festival brought us on an international trip for the first time. The border patrol made sure they had their say in whether we were allowed into Canada. We performed. We explored. We partied. A detour to the Big Boy in Port Huron on the way back made the return trip that much more enjoyable.

Seattle

Multiple trips to the Emerald City for the Seattle Festival of Improv Theater produced some great memories, including an album cover photo shoot in Gas Works Park, a visit to the Twin Peaks diner for amazing hot dogs, antics at Pike's Place Market, lots of shuffleboard, and a thorough comedy assault as we annihilated the Seattle audiences with laughter. We didn't break anyone's belongings, I swear!

Milwaukee

Dirty Water made its mark on Milwaukee via multiple appearances in the Milwaukee Comedy Festival. We crashed on the organizer's couch, and unwisely dissed Steely Dan at a Milwaukee dive bar.

Michigan

Trips to the Michigan Improv and Laugh Festival (MILF) in Ann Arbor and JFT's lake house in Michigan lead to run-ins with Bassprov, finding lost troupe members on Hiscock St., and lots of swimming, canoeing and shoving each other off the docks during picturesque summer days.

Austin

We made the loooong drive to Austin for the Out of Bounds Comedy Festival in 2009. During the trip, we encountered overly friendly locals at a smoky diner, made a bad ass tubing excursion, ate amazing BBQ and Mexican food, bombed on stage, and survived Debauchery Road.

St. Louis

What do young baseball-loving buddies do with the time in between half days at work? Drive to Missouri to meet up with Andy Lucas and company, catch a rematch of the 2004 World Series, celebrate Pirate Night, and have an unfortunate White Castle experience, that's what.

San Francisco

During your time in San Francisco, Mrs. Tires and I met up with you and your then wife-to-be Katie. We checked out one of baseball's best ballparks (cold ankles!), chilled in Dolores Park, and went on an impromptu California road trip through legit redwoods to do some oyster schucking and beer tasting.

Boston

Since our friendship was born in Massachusetts, it's no surprise that we made several trips to Boston over the years. We saw amazing Red Sox vs Yankees games thanks to Dirty Water and Bill McKinney, got interviewed by TV 38, and spent a wonderful Fourth of July on the banks of the River Charles. One time, a search for a missing set piece sent you to Logan Airport. The missing piece was two blocks away. Our drive from Chicago to Boston for the beginning of your Harvard years was bittersweet, but at least we got on Worcester sports radio.

Philadelphia

Our visit to Philadelphia was packed with history, laughter, cheesesteak, and farts. Not sure why I was surprised when I snuck up to the after party way before it actually started and found you and the rest of Dirty Water already there.

New Hampshire

In the brief period of time between the end of our years at UMass and the beginning of our time in Chicago, you came up to New Hampshire for what we thought would be a long-term good bye. We woke up extra early to catch the New England sunrise, something neither of us had ever done despite living on the east coast our entire lives. When the waitress at the diner we stopped by afterwards asked what we were doing up so early, I told her we we were catching the sunrise together...but we're NOT gay!

Virginia

A friend at William and Mary and another working as a performer at Busch Gardens were more than enough reason to make the trek to Virginia. Or was it Graceland? The coasters were fast, the shows were hilarious, and Busch Gardens' halloween facelift provided a ton of entertainment. To the Theme Park! Kind of crazy to think that your future wife was on the William and Mary campus when we visited. 

New Orleans

A prolific bachelor deserves an epic bachelor party. New Orleans proved to be the perfect setting. We did some world-class partying, caught some music, and passed around an alligator. Plus, you got some stage time.

Photo by G. Scott Olson

Minnesota

We've hit the Twin Cities three times. Twice we went for the Twin Cities Improv Festival, where we pulled off a beer caper, mouthed off at a toll booth operator, and caught a St. Paul Saints game. Train! Our more recent trip with our amazing wives brought us to a new baseball stadium, showed us some really cool sculptures (and even cooler mini-golf) and brought us to a majestic waterfall. It was a great reminder that, Jeez Louise, even though we're full-blown adults now, there's no need to stop exploring.

To all the road trips in the rearview mirror, and all the miles ahead...Happy Birthday, Jon!

For more tributes, check out #JRDturns33

Vermont

Vermont is a wonderful state. The natural beauty of its lush forests and rolling hills are a huge draw, and I have always loved its laid back, progressive attitude. When I grow old and my traveling days are over, I hope to retire there.

My first significant venture into the state came at the tail end of my first cross-country trip in the summer of 2000, which took my friend Cein and me from California to Nevada, Utah, Colorado, Wyoming, South Dakota, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Indiana and through the eastern states before delivering us to Vermont. After a thrilling and adventurous week-long journey, Cein's grandmother's house in Bennington, VT provided a great place to relax and reflect on our trip. We spent lots of time sitting on the back porch, where we enjoyed this marvelous view:

We made one excursion during our stay there, a quick trek to the resting place of famous New England poet Robert Frost. 

A few years later, I would find myself studying at the University of Massachusetts, Amherst, which is close to the Vermont border. When my friends and I needed to get away, we'd cruise over to Brattleboro, VT, a charming small town with a handful of restaurants, bars, head shops, vintage stores and other attractions that were perfect for college students. Brattleboro's classic brick buildings and its proximity to the Connecticut river added to the appeal. If you're in the area, I definitely recommend a stop there.

Burlington is another popular destination in Vermont. I have only been there once, but I would welcome the opportunity to visit again. This town embodies a lot of what people think of when they think of Vermont. Young hippies are common sights, the attitude is relaxed, and there's a lot of brick and wood. My college comedy friends and I cruised up to Burlington for a show by the Jazz Guys, a band that featured one of the original members of our sketch group, Casual Sketch. They played at Nectar's, a fantastic music venue that is famous for helping launch Phish's career. The Jazz Guys were on point that night, and it was a blast to dance like maniacs while they rocked out. As an added bonus, they treated us to a rendition of the Jam Dog song. Jam Dog was my nickname in college, and my musically inclined comedy friends wrote this song so it could be my theme song. It was a ton of fun to hear it performed live on stage.

The Ben and Jerry's Factory is another popular destination in the state. Located in Waterbury, VT, the factory offers tours that include the history of the company, a view of the huge ice cream-making equipment, and a sample scoop. The time I visited, I patiently waited while people of all ages rushed up and grabbed samples as quickly as they could. My patience was rewarded by missing out on the Half Baked tasting, leaving me with a sample of Fat Free Strawberry Swirl. Sheesh.

If you go, be sure to make the hike up to the flavor graveyard, a quirky, tongue-in-cheek resting place for ice cream flavors that are no longer offered.

Don’t tell Massachusetts or Maine that I said this, but Vermont is easily my favorite New England state for road tripping.

Must See in Vermont:

• Ben and Jerry's Factory (Waterbury)
• Nectar's (Burlington)

Check it Out: 

• Brattleboro
• Burlington
• Bennington

The "Next Time" List: 

• More time in Burlington
• Retiring and living at a lake house

Connecticut

I drove through Connecticut several times while growing up in New England, usually on my way to points south and west. I haven't spent much time visiting the state. Quite frankly, there isn't much to see in Connecticut. 

When I look back on my trips through the state, one misadventure stands out. I was driving from the University of Massachusetts, Amherst to New Jersey to visit my friend Hannah at Drew University. It was snowing during the trip and the roads were getting slippery. Foolishly, I was cruising in the left lane. There was some construction going on, so a series of large cement dividers stood to my left.

As I was driving along, my car hit a particularly slippery patch and lost its grip on the road. My adrenaline shot up as I tried to regain control. I was able to steer myself away from the cement dividers and avoided a direct collision, but in the process, my car turned 90 degrees counter-clockwise and the front bumper scraped and dragged against the cement blocks as I brought it to a full stop. Fortunately the cars behind me saw this and were able to stop and avoid hitting me. However, this left me in a precarious position, as I was stuck and would have to back up into a lane of moving traffic to get myself unstuck. At that point, my adrenaline was at its max. I was trying to figure out how I was going to get myself out of this jam while also fearing a pileup behind me as others come to a stop.

After about a minute of holding up traffic, the driver of a mack truck saw what was going on, slowed down and stopped before he got to me so I could back out. I straightened myself out and got back on the road. I waved my hand vigorously to thank the driver as I drove away.

When I reached the next exit, I pulled off to assess the damage. This brought me to Bridgeport, CT, a shady town on the west side of the state. I was quite relieved to see that I got away with just a scratched front bumper and no further damages. As I concluded that both the car and I were fine, I noticed the car next to me trying to get out of a heap of snow. I pushed his car as he steered, and we got him out. He waved emphatically as he drove away. I felt I had repaid the good deed bestowed on me by the mack truck driver.

I spent the rest of the trip driving at a snail's pace to keep the car under control as I made my way to New Jersey. It was a close call, and I was very lucky there wasn't any serious damage. 

The other story I have from Connecticut is actually not mine, it's my Dad's. 

There are two casinos in Connecticut, Foxwoods and Mohegan Sun. My dad is a big fan of slot machines, and his favorite thing to do is drop by one of these casinos to try his luck. On his birthday a few years back, he left work, picked up my stepmother, and headed over to Foxwoods. They had lousy luck there, so they decided to drive to the other casino and see if they'd have better luck. Mohegan Sun didn’t treat them any better, but they had a blast trying. They returned home at about 4:00 AM, slept for an hour and a half, and then went to work the next day. I definitely get my spirit of adventure from him. 

While I haven’t really explored Connecticut, my friend Drex (the guest photographer for the post on Washington DC) is a native of the Constitution State, and he has a few destination suggestions. He recommends the town of Essex, and specifically the Griswold Inn and the Essex Steam Train, plus the nearby Gillette Castle State Park. Additionally, he says movie buffs will enjoy a trip to Mystic, Connecticut, which is featured in the movie Mystic Pizza. However, he warns against falling into the trap of actually trying the food at Mystic Pizza. 

Pennsylvania, Part 2: Pittsburgh

My love of stadium chasing reached a fever pitch in 2011 when my friend Matt and I planned a road trip specifically to go to a ballpark we’d never visited before. After weighing our destination options, we chose PNC Park in Pittsburg, which is known as one of the best ballparks in all of baseball. A quick scan of the Pittsburgh Pirates schedule revealed the perfect opportunity - a stretch in June when the Pirates were hosting my favorite team, the Boston Red Sox.

Matt played the role of photographer on this trip - all photos in this post are courtesy of him. Thanks, Matt!

Pittsburgh is a fairly hefty seven hour drive from Chicago, but luckily our friends Adam and Dan were willing to join us, split the driving, and add to the fun. With vacation days at a premium, we had to cram the entire trip into one weekend. We hit the road as early as we could on Friday, and after an enjoyable but uneventful drive, we arrived at the Days Inn in Pittsburgh at about 2:00 AM. 

Even through road-weary eyes, we could tell the hotel we chose was total crap. It smelled like stale foot odor, there were cigarette burns on the sheets, the pool looked like it hadn't been cleaned in years, and the building was literally crumbling. I guess that's what you get in Pittsburgh for $40 per night. 

Despite our late arrival the night before, we work up early the next morning to take advantage of our only full day in the city. We started by heading down to the stadium to have a look around. The area around the ballpark was sparsely populated despite both the Pirates and Steelers stadiums being located in the middle of downtown and right next to each other. 

We had an early lunch, and got some advice from the waitress that we should check out the Duquesne Incline. It was a mile and a half from where we were, so walking there gave us a good opportunity to check out the town. 

It didn't take long for us to realize that Pittsburgh was a lot different than we had anticipated. I envisioned an old, run down, industrial city, but instead I found many new, shiny, beautiful buildings and a lot of friendly people. As we stopped to take a photo of the skyline, a jogger gave us a genuine "Welcome to Pittsburgh!" as she ran by. You certainly don't find that kind of hospitality in Chicago.

We took our time getting to the incline and ran into some quirk along the way, including a huge, in-progress sand sculpture in a tent on the waterfront. 

Eventually we made it to the Duquesne Incline, an unusual mode of transportation that looks like the bastard child of a trolley and an escalator. Originally it was created to haul cargo up Mount Washington, but it was later repurposed as a form of public transportation. There was a long line to get on, but we were entertained by the view of the exposed inner workings of the incline while we waited. 

After about a half an hour wait, we got on to one of the trolley cars. The ride was simple but charming, and we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves on the way to the top. 

Upon exiting the cable car, we found ourselves at the observation deck, which offered some amazing views of the entire city. Additionally, many news clippings and artifacts displayed the history of the incline and of Pittsburgh. 

We had a round-trip ticket, which granted return access within three hours of the initial ride, so we took advantage of this by grabbing a drink at the nearby Grandview Saloon. Despite the casual name, this place was actually rather fancy and pretentious. It took a good fifteen minutes to get the attention of the bartender, and when we were finally noticed, we were "greeted” with a snooty, entitled attitude that was thankfully unmatched anywhere else in the city. We gulped down our drinks in less time than it took to order them, under-tipped for the lousy service, and hightailed it out of there. Needless to say, I don't recommend this place. 

We were able to hop on a return car pretty quickly and enjoyed a leisurely descent back down the mountain.

From there we took an alternate route back to the stadium, goofing around along the way. 

We arrived back in the vicinity of the ballpark with time to spare, so we wandered over to Market Square, a really cool area with a variety of restaurants that had recently been renovated and closed off to traffic. We grabbed an outdoor table at NOLA on the Square, a New Orleans-themed bar and restaurant, and enjoyed some delicious food and a few beers. While we sat there, we chatted with our accommodating waitress and some of the patrons. The table next to us was occupied by a friendly older couple who had been Pirates fans their whole lives. If you're a baseball fan, you know why this is so remarkable. The Pirates have been historically horrible, often occupying last place in their division. That's part of what makes their fans so special. They're small in number, but very dedicated. The couple we talked to could thoroughly recite stretches of Pirates history from memory, and they were plenty forthcoming with their optimism for the team. 

Finally it was game time. We tipped generously (we’re only cheap when warranted) and then headed to the Roberto Clemente bridge, one of many yellow bridges that cross the Allegheny River. There are several of these bridges, and they're all painted the same yellow color. It's no coincidence that yellow is the main hue in the color scheme of all of Pittsburgh's major sports teams.

Only pedestrian traffic is allowed on the Roberto Clemente bridge before games, and the energy of the crowd crossing the bridge to get to the ballpark was palpable and contagious. 

When we entered the stadium, the first thing we noticed was the beautiful cityscape that's visible beyond the outfield wall. The Roberto Clemente bridge and the rest of downtown were directly in view, and with them being so close to the stadium, it felt like the skyline was an extension of the ballpark itself. I truly believe that the color coordination and visual prominence of the yellow bridges is a huge part of the city's identity, and it leads to a sense of unity among the city, the sports teams and the citizens. 

We loved PNC Park. It was super easy to navigate, as the walkways were wide and they afford access to the entire park. This was quite convenient as we had standing room seats and ended up moving around to different sections of the stadium throughout the game. It was a fairly new ballpark, but it featured old school charm. There were plenty of food options (though we were too full from our meal at NOLA to try them) and there were lots of beer stands. It was a fairly small stadium that featured just two levels, which, combined with the close-up view of the city, lead to an intimate, comfortable feel.

The only thing I didn't enjoy about our visit was the 6-4 beating the underdog Pirates handed the Red Sox. That having been said, I loved the vibe of the energized and empowered Pirates fans as they watched their developing team beat up on one of the baseball’s best clubs. It was clear that the Pirates were on their way to becoming a major force in the National League. The fans' enthusiasm for this evolution could hardly be contained.

What's more, we were treated to a great post-game fireworks show.

We were pretty tired after the game, but we weren't ready to say goodbye to Pittsburgh just yet, so we headed back over the bridge to Market Square so we could enjoy a few more beverages and some revelry.

We returned to our scuzzy hotel after a few drinks and decided to play a casual round of cribbage to end the night. This laid back game quickly became heated, and lead to some roughhousing, as evident in this photo.

The ride home the next day was smooth and peaceful. We had great weather, and we listened to the final game of the Red Sox vs. Pirates series on the radio. The Red Sox won the game that day, but it wasn't enough to salvage the series, which the Pirates won, two games to one. There was also some back seat cribbage going on, and thankfully that game didn't lead to a brawl.

We had so much fun during this trip that ballpark road trips became an annual tradition, inspiring our trips to Progressive Field and Great American Ball Park in 2012 and Kauffman Stadium in 2013. 

More Stadium Chasing: 

Busch Stadium (II and III)
Kauffman Stadium
Progressive Field
Great American Ball Park
Oriole Park at Camden Yards
Fenway Park
AT&T Park
Dodger Stadium
Angel Stadium of Anaheim
Comerica Park
Citi Field

Must See in Pennsylvania: 

• Pat's King of Steaks (Philadelphia)
• Independence Mall (Philadelphia)
• PNC Park (Pittsburgh)

Check it Out: 

• Duquesne Incline (Pittsburgh)
• Market Square (Pittsburgh)

Skip it:

• Edgar Allen Poe House (Philadelphia)
• Geno's Steaks (Philadelphia)

The "Next Time" list

• Citizens Bank Park (Philadelphia)

Special thanks to Matt Lang for the photos featured in this post! Check out his blog about being a Cubs season ticket holder at www.section403.com, and follow him on Twitter: @mattylang

For more on Pennsylvania, see Pennsylvania, Part 1: Philadelphia

Pennsylvania, Part 1: Philadelphia

Pennsylvania is a fantastic state for road tripping. Philadelphia and Pittsburgh are fascinating cities, and the points in between are beautiful. I've had several adventures while cruising through this state, each of which has been exciting and memorable in its own way.

My first trip through Pennsylvania was with my college sketch comedy group Casual Sketch in the spring of 2000. We were on our way to perform at a comedy festival at the University of Miami, Ohio. My friend Adam was riding shotgun. Being a native of Pennsylvania, he proclaimed himself to be an expert at navigating the state. Additionally, he was convinced that Pennsylvania cops turned a blind eye to speeding, and as such, our stint through the state would be a great opportunity to hit the gas and save some time. I was suspicious of this claim and refused to test it while I was driving, so when we pulled off at the first rest stop in Pennsylvania, he took the wheel and I took shotgun.  From there we gunned it down the highway, hitting speeds upwards of 90 MPH.

It didn't take long before Adam's theory of lax law enforcement was proven wrong. Flashing blues caught up to us after about ten miles. The cop was not kind, and he clearly got a great deal of satisfaction from writing us a $250 ticket. In the process, he asked for our registration and proof of insurance. I reached for my wallet to produce the insurance card, only to realize the wallet wasn't in my pocket. I searched the car frantically as the cop lectured us, but the insurance card - and the wallet - were nowhere to be found. There was only one explanation. It must have fallen out of the car when we switched drivers.

After accepting the ticket, we doubled back and returned to the rest stop, driving at a much more reasonable speed this time. Sure enough, the wallet was sitting on the ground in the rest stop parking lot. The speeding ticket was a total bummer, but clearly we deserved it, and without it, we could have driven hundreds of miles before I noticed my wallet was missing. 

The rest of the trip was plenty eventful. It included a bizarre interaction at a Burger King that's detailed in the post on Ohio, and a kick-ass show at the comedy festival which would be our first taste of success as a group. On the way back, Adam was inspired to drive for fourteen hours straight. At 3:00 AM, he put Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon in the CD player and blasted it as we cruised up the Merritt Parkway. That was the first time I had heard the album. I'd go on to listen to it about eighteen thousand more times over the next fifteen years.

About a year after my first encounter with Pennsylvania, Adam and I were sitting in our friend Jeremy's dorm room and the three of us had just started watching the Big Lebowski. As the opening credits rolled, we started talking about dinner, and Jeremy brought up his craving for cheesesteak. Adam said he knew where to get the world's best cheesesteak. It was a mere five hours away. This sparked an idea that's completely idiotic by conventional standards, but downright brilliant to college students who are adventurous and hungry. Road trip! We turned off the DVD player, grabbed some provisions, picked up Jeremy's girlfriend Senofer, and hit the road to Philadelphia.

After an antic-filled drive that included stopping at the signs that announced the arrival of each new state, we arrived in Philadelphia at about 4:30 AM. In the pre-dawn hours, I could already tell that Philadelphia was a vibrant and bizarre city. Colorful murals appeared on every street corner, and two-way roads were separated by a row of cars parallel parked in the center of the street.

Eventually we made it through the city and arrived at our destination, Pat's King of Steaks. This place is not just an eatery, it's a Philadelphia institution. Pat's has been around for eighty-five years and it claims to be the inventor of the cheesesteak sandwich. Fortunately for us, it's open twenty-four hours a day.

Ordering a cheesesteak at Pat’s is a ritual akin to that of the soup nazi from Seinfeld. One must swiftly specify their cheese and onion preferences, and then scoot over to the next window to order drinks and sides. I recommend a “cheez whiz wit," which is short for a steak sandwich with cheez whiz and grilled onions. Cheez whiz is nasty on its own, but it is absolute heaven on a cheesesteak sandwich. 'Wit' is short for 'with onions.' You can also order them 'witout.'

The result is a delicious sandwich featuring tender, juicy steak, delicious melted cheese, and tasty grilled onions on a toasted bun. It's a fantastic meal that was made even better by the journey we took to obtain it.

Jeremy, Adam and I enjoy the sandwich worth a 300 mile journey to obtain.

Across the street from Pat's lies Geno's Steaks, a flashier steak shop that lacks the character of Pat's but somehow features longer lines. Which shop has the better sandwich is the subject of much debate among Philadelphia locals. If you meet someone from Philly, you can bond with them instantly by asking them, "Pat's or Geno's?" Pat's has a clear viewpoint on the matter...

This trip was a point of pride for me as a budding road tripper. It was an insane thing to do, and yet it brought me somewhere I had never been before, and now it makes for a great story. I'd do it again. In fact, I did. We repeated the trip a year later.

In December of 2003, I flew from Chicago to New Hampshire for Christmas and Hanukkah. Holiday travel was absolutely nuts that year due to a combination of a labor strike and several airline employees calling in sick. My flight out of Chicago was delayed significantly, so by the time I got into Philadelphia, I was too late to catch my connecting flight to NH. Faced with the possibility of sleeping at the airport that night, I decided to call Adam, who was home in Pennsylvania with his family. He was kind enough to pick me up at the airport and bring me to his parents' place for the night. Along the way, we stopped at Pat's for cheesesteaks.

I got a chance to explore Philly more thoroughly when my comedy group Dirty Water made the trek from Chicago to Philly for the Philadelphia Improv Festival in the fall of 2008. As we drove a rented minivan through Ohio on the way to our destination, we were greeted by flashing blue lights and an invitation to pull over and chat with Ohio law enforcement. I was clearly going over the speed limit, but when he questioned me, I played dumb and acted as though I had no idea of the acceleration guidelines. Much to the surprise of everyone in the van, the act worked and he let us off with a warning. It may have helped my bashful performance that I was sporting a breathe-right strip during our conversation.

The next day, we had some time to explore Philadelphia. We started our day at the Independence Mall, which is home to a cluster of historic sites. The area is anchored by Independence Hall, which is pictured at the beginning of this post and is famous for hosting our country's forefathers while they declared independence from England and established our country. Other attractions in the area include Betsy Ross' house, Christ Church (where our county's forefathers went to get their God on), the Graff House (where Thomas Jefferson wrote the Declaration of Independence), the US Mint, and the Liberty Bell. We wandered around this area for a couple of hours, enjoying the sites from the outside. The whole area is beautiful and inviting, and it made for a wonderful stroll. Independence Mall reminded me of the Freedom Trail in Boston, only Independence Hall is maintained much better, it's easier to navigate, and the manicured bricks are much less likely to break your ankles than the cobblestones in Beantown. Personally I'm not much of a history buff, but anyone who is could spend days exploring Independence Mall's many sites, inside and out.

While perusing a gift shop in the area, I noticed a postcard advertising another historic site - Edgar Allen Poe's house. Being a big Poe fan, I somehow convinced the rest of the group that we should check it out. We hoofed it to the house and joined a free tour. The price was right. While it was cool to be at one of my favorite author's former abode, the attraction was little more than an old, empty, furniture-less rickety house that was all-in-all rather disappointing. Still, we managed to have a few laughs.

Listening for the Tell-Tale Heart

Freaking out while exploring Poe's basement

With our quota of historic sites now officially filled, we got a recommendation from a local to head to the Eulogy Belgian Tavern. This cozy bar fit our needs and then some, with a menu of 400+ beers and a reputation for outstanding oysters. We shared a bucket of these delicious mollusks and sipped a variety of brews. While it was tough to choose just one or two pints from the gigantic menu, I struck gold by choosing a Lancaster Milk Stout. It turned out to be literally the best beer I had ever tasted.

After our stop at the Eulogy Tavern, we said goodbye to our time as tourists and started the clock on our time as performers by heading over to the theater for our Saturday night set. To be honest, I really don't remember how the show went. They all blur together after a while. Let's just assume we were hilarious and the whole festival loved us.

After the show, the group split up for a while, and I hung out in the theater to catch the next round of performances. While most of the groups at the festival were fantastic, the last show of the evening was a dud, and as it went from bad to worse, I hatched a plan to sneak up to the after party early, stake out a spot, and grab an early beer. Leaving another group's show is generally frowned upon, and the party was not supposed to kick off until all of the shows were done for the evening, but what can I say? I was thirsty! As I stealthily snuck upstairs, I wondered if I would be the only one there. Turns out I was not - the rest of Dirty Water was already up there, yukking it up and getting the party started.

Don't think for a second that we managed to skip the cheesesteak during this trip. We made two stops at Pat’s during our stay, and though we had to leave early in the morning on Sunday, we managed one more stop at Pat's on our way out of town.

Check out Pennsylvania, Part 2: Pittsburgh